the big daddy skillet

I have decided to look at this project by combining my archeology skills (which are none) with my anthropology skills (which I acquired from taking anthroplogy 101 at SUNY Albany from one of those long haired pony tail white guys that gave himself a Native American name in 1978 and doesn't know that if he is already bald on top then it is time to cut off the pony tail) and do an item by item analysis of the clutter in my house. I am going to start at the top layer and dig down. I am going to factor in the historical and social significance of the clutter. I began by going down into the basement and looking at some of the things that we almost never use to see which ones I could part with. There is the Ablounger which my husband bought to help us get flatter abs. This is the ultimate lazy persons way of tightening your abs..You sit in this chair and roll up and down by pulling on the bar on the top and pushing down with your legs. You can even do it while you watch tv. Somehow even with such a simple exercise tool at my disposal, I still have not managed to get on the Ablounger other than to sit on it while I wait for the dryer to finish its cycle. I've thought about getting rid of it but I think it may provide for an interesting sexual experience at some point. Then as I scanned all of the other items that were collecting dust and mold down there, I banged my shin against something hard. After a quick curse word I reached down to grab whatever it was that I had bumped into. This object is perhaps the biggest single use item that we own. It was a frying pan..no, not just a frying pan-it was the big daddy skillet...it's about 3 feet in diameter-and that is not a lie! We got it about 10 years ago when we were heading out for a camping trip. We drove past an old time variety store somewhere in the Adirondacks and stopped to get eggs, milk, coffee and other last minute essentials. Then my husband spied the big daddy skillet resting on a hook on the wall. I shot off my "we don't need that look" He shot back a "yeah but it looks like fun look." The boys all clamored at me "mom-please we need it." I said no about a hundred more times until we finally loaded it into the mini-van and used it for the next few days to cook dozens of eggs and pancakes over an open fire. After we came home, we unpacked and put it in the basement. Husband claims that we have cooked with it since that trip but I disagree. As far as I can remember it hasn't been used as anything except a shin banger. I want to get rid of it but he refuses.Says he still needs it. I guess I can use it the next time that my girlfriends and I decide to go late night skinny dipping down in the pond. After we giggle and splash in the dark water we will run back to the house but forget to lock the front door. Then that guy with the hockey mask carrying a chain saw will come busting into the house and BAM we will smash him on the head with the big daddy skillet. Or maybe one day my whole family will start playing thier musical instruments again, and I will learn to sing and we will all wear velvet pant suits and drive around in a painted school bus and pull off to the side of the road and cook up an omelet to feed our groupies. I have been getting rid of small items like candles and baskets but it is time to move onto the larger stuff. It looks like the big daddy skillet will stay but I am definitely getting rid of something large soon-anyone want a 6'5", 45 year old man that can make a pancake the size of rhode island?